The following text was found on papers left backstage at the festival this weekend. Seems some people have some great plans for the festival next year…By great I mean huge, not in terms of grandeur or how popular they may or may not be….thoughts please.
Glastonbury / Rowley Wood 2008
1 – Tarmac/asphalt the entire site.
This will alleviate the mud/rain issues and more importantly allow easy access and mobility for our key demographic of the over 50s and to keep rain to a minimum, a roof to be installed over the site
2 – Pyramid Stage to be renamed Emirates Stage. This branding will bring in £20 million in revenue for the next 4 years. The Other Stage will be handed over to 02, who have put forward a fee in excess of £30million over the next four years
3 – Removal of all trees apart from the perimiter area, which should help reduce the amount of people who can see in without paying. There is also the removal of risk for those who climb these deathtraps with the intention of getting a better view of the stages. This is a revenue stream we cannot control, without removing them. Which is in the saftey interests of all.
4 – Glasto Webcast. For the 200,000+ people who didn’t manage to gain access we can charge them £15 – £25 per day to see any band they want from the comfort of their own home.
5 – Reduction of the overall size of the event by 1/3rd. We will use this space to build four high rise apartment towers renting out at £800 for the Glastonbury event. Included in this price will be two tickets. The space we will reclaim will be the Green Fields, which are the least profitable in terms of revenue.
6 – The possible movement of the event to Slough. Creating a bypass from the M4 (easy access from Heathrow for our ClearChannel Bretheren) allows Londoners, the most important visitors to the festival a quick in/out. We have identified the Rowley Wood area of Berkshire as a potential site.
7 – With all this work that we are planning on doing for the benefit of festival goers and those who want to keep the great Glastonbury Spirit, we will need to raise admission prices by at least 30%, going up to £230 next year.
“I remember when this was all fields….”